nymphomaniac – uncut


“The grunting and grimacing epic stars Charlotte Gainsbourg, Jamie Bell, Uma Thurman and Shia Labeouf, and is hotly anticipated both because of von Trier’s controversial status and because its scenes of coitus are expected to be envelop-pushing.” http://movies.yahoo.com/news/nymphomaniac-screen-uncut-version-berlin-film-festival-152735471.html

I don’t know where to begin with this cinematic bullshit (and my language isn’t foul, it’s controversial and envelope-pushing).  What is it about watching people fuck, that makes it interesting? If this movie had no fucking, sorry, coitus, would you bother to watch it? I will take your silence as a resounding no. Ooh ahh, genitals close up, multiple partners, S&M, oh my! Really? Why do you continue to lie to yourself and call such drivel cutting edge art. In its simplest form, it is a film which offers the fucking as the full course, and plot as garnishment. I’m sure you’re thinking  this film is worthy because it delves into sex addiction. Ok. True sex addicts are the same as drug addicts: they destroy the lives of their families and friends, all for the sake of that next high. There is nothing sexy about self-destruction. Know this: if you take pleasure in watching films of this caliber, you are a true Schadenfreude.

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