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  • ContactRida 6:00 am on June 1, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , invention   

    open letter to Professor Rogers 

    When I woke up on Friday, you did not exist. My world seemed large, my opportunities seemed limitless. I woke up and all was possible. I had just finished my shift. I was more than ever convinced bedside nursing was not for me. Long term care has become a last stop for unmanageable mentally ill patients, from Alzheimer’s to schizophrenia. It’s become increasingly hard to notice a change in condition when the baseline is always manic.

    Now was the time to start working on my invention. I had seen too many patients with red streaks on their arms from the blood pressure cuff; heard too many complaints that the cuff hurts; wasted so much time getting vitals on patients because there’s only one machine and it constantly malfunctions. “This can’t be the state of healthcare in America,” I thought.

    I thought about something that could measure vitals without the bruises, without the pain, without the wait. A patch. A vitals check patch. OK. I named it. I conquered the first few steps of an idea. The next step: run a search to see if it already exists. That step took weeks because I didn’t want to know. Didn’t want all of my dreams dashed. Didn’t want to know I had missed the boat again.

    So Friday I searched. Friday I found you. Ever get that sinking feeling in your stomach when an elevator first takes off? Multiply that by 100. That’s what I felt: gutted. And it’s not like you beat me by a few weeks. You beat me by several years. And just like that, my world became small again, I became nobody, just another working stiff embodying the words of a Paul Simon song, slip slidin’ away.

    Why should you care? Why should I, out of the tens of thousands who contact you, be relevant? I can’t answer that for you. I can only tell you that this was going to be ‘it’ for me. A product of rape, coming from poverty, winning a four year scholarship, getting a degree in Political Science, then Law, practicing as a criminal defense attorney for a year, quitting, becoming a massage therapist, then completing an accelerated 12 month nursing program to achieve my BSN and now working on my Masters to become a FNP, and most likely getting my Doctorate in Nursing before I die, plus taking violin lessons and learning French this summer, why should I be relevant to you?

    I have no engineering background, no mathematical genius. Business acumen? Perhaps. Being knee deep in healthcare does give me an advantage, an insight your developers may not have. But this is what I know to be true: on Friday you did not exist. Today you do. But today, you now know I exist. I can’t help but believe that makes me somewhat relevant to you.


  • ContactRida 3:57 am on April 30, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: Brad Pitt, brain damage, Fight Club, , , Pixies   

    Dain Bramage 

    Hey. Yeah it’s me. We seem to keep missing each other. I know you are terribly busy making over a trillion connections a second but if I could have your ear… ha…funny. Our ear. Anyway, it has come to my attention that you and I are not on the same page on a few things. No. No. I am not criticizing you. You are magnificent on most days- Ok. Wait, stop. Yes, I do know you process billions, sorry, trillions of bits of data in a nanosecond.

    You are the most efficient machine, most efficient organic miracle of a machine which all of the stars in the heavens cannot begin to rival. Yes, you’re welcome. All I’m saying is that… that sometimes… wait. Here’s an example of how awesome you are. I love it when I go to the grocery store and pick up orange juice for no apparent reason and 24 hours later I feel a cold coming on. I know. I know. You knew before I did that a cold was coming. Incredible. And I love how I think I’m lost sometimes and I turn left or right for no good reason and I end up where I’m supposed to be. Yeah. I always knew that business about a bit of magnetic North in our nose was urban legend. You have a photographic memory unknown to me and sometimes I accidentally tap into it.

    Wish I could tap into it all of the time but that’s another conversation. Again, I’m sorry, I’ll get to the point. Uh… I’ve noticed, and stop me if I’m wrong, but I’ve noticed that you are perhaps off-sync with some of my bodily functions. Yes… those. Funny you should say that. Yes, shit does indeed happen. But does it have to happen as soon as I finish taking a shower? The warm water? Umm…but you do it when I’m about to leave the house and I’m all dressed and running late. When have I ever shit myself? Ok! Ok! Ok! When have I ever shit myself in the car? Fine! When have I ever shit myself in the car as a full grown adult? Never. Thank you.

    All I’m saying is that you’re off-sync and not just with the pooh business. My point is my period, my menses. I am aware I am getting older and I’m sorta now on a 56 day cycle instead of 28, but this isn’t the first time my girlfriend has visited at suspect times. Like now for example. What’s wrong with now? Now doesn’t work for me now! I still have one more final to go. See that’s just it. I don’t KNOW that I will do great. Perhaps you are privy to all of the secrets of the universe, but I don’t know- Funny. Yes. I was about to say shit. Yes I see where I get my humor from… anyway, I’m still really stressed and this bloody, yes, haha, this bloody business could have waited until after that last final. Stop saying that! I don’t know I will pass.

    You know what? How come when I was at Target 3 days ago, you didn’t bother to tell me to get toilet paper? You knew I was out of it and you knew you were sending a period my way. Where was the head’s up on that one? Lead a horse to water? So, let me get this straight… when you sent me down that aisle I was supposed to know to buy it? You know I only buy Cottonelle and only when it’s on sale, and it wasn’t on sale 3 days ago. Ok. First I’m a horse, now I’m a stubborn mule, thank you, nice. Could I at least evolve into a creature with opposable thumbs please. No. Perhaps you are the funnier one.

    Ok. Riddle me this Joker. Could you please tell me why instead of waking me up to pee, you give me dream after dream that I am peeing? But that’s just it! I don’t wake up because I think I’m already awake and peeing! Do you not see the insaneness of it all? The dream cannot be the wake up! One time you had me pressing on my bladder in the dream to pee but I was actually in real life pressing on my bladder and I did wet myself. Yes I woke up! I woke up because I just pissed myself!

    You know what? I can see you are not taking me seriously and yes I am pissed off, haha, you made another funny. I’m not laughing though. This was a bad idea. Yes. Yes it was. Please. Please. Make a mental- Yes mental. Make a mental note of what I am doing and when I am doing it. Please process the data and extrapolate whether or not it would be a good idea for that particular bodily function to occur at that particular time. I am sure in all of your infinite wisdom, you will make the appropriate choice. Agreed? Nice. Gas. I will take that as a yes.


    photo credit: http://www.revolutionmyspace.com/image-code-1/fight_club

  • ContactRida 8:05 am on April 2, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: crunch time, , panic, stressed out   

    4 more weeks of… 

    I have four more weeks of class, or at least, I hope I have only four. As I have written previously, my academic fate dangles in the balance. I may have to repeat that class this summer. So, thinking of that just made me sleepy. So I slept for most of Tuesday. No. I wasn’t depressed. I just wanted my body to experience unapologetic rest before the shit-storm of:
    no sleep,
    attempted daily studying,
    some writing,
    non-stop double shift working every weekend,
    one day of teaching students,
    waiting for my GM car to blow up since the engine light is always on now, did I mention I just took it to the dealership to have the ‘check engine light’ problem repaired,
    and continue my diet,
    do my taxes,
    correction, start my taxes,
    and stretch my back on my yoga ball because I think I’m getting a hunch back from leaning over my patients’ beds,
    plus deal with my mother who said she wanted to move, which means I will have to finance that,
    and text with this guy I’ve known for over three years, whom I’ve never kissed or held hands with, but I would like to marry some day,
    but ok with the idea of being forever single since I unofficially married myself to me a day ago,
    since I will never leave me,
    and will always provide for me
    and keep me safe,
    and love me unconditionally.

    So. You can see why I slept all day Tuesday:)
    photo credit: http://www1.free-clipart.net/gallery2/clipart/Business/Cartoons/Time_Running_Out.jpg

    • Dawn 7:58 pm on April 2, 2014 Permalink | Reply

      Hang in there girl. All this craziness WILL eventually end. Take naps every chance you get, drink wine every chance you get and don’t let the stress get the best of you! …keep me posted on this guy…I want to know more 🙂

      • ContactRida 2:07 am on April 4, 2014 Permalink | Reply

        Hey lovely lady! I”ve been thinking of you lately. nothing serious, just wondering how life is with you. tick tock for me. i really don’t want to repeat this class but see it as an opportunity to be better, but really don’t want it to happen. how are your little ones? i keep getting asked at work if i have any kids. um no. “oh don’t worry, you have time.” i just let those statements go and say ‘yeah’. weird. people keep trying to put babies in me. this guy, Andrew, whom i have known for over 3 years, is an anomaly, but very interesting. i invited him to vegas, so we shall see. your invite is still open as well:)

        • Dawn 5:16 pm on April 5, 2014 Permalink | Reply

          Yeah that whole strangers putting babies in you is just kind of odd. Why do people say that, “you still have time”. …as if it never occurred to people that maybe you don’t even want kids. Not saying you don’t but, ya know?

          Anywaaaaaay. Kids are good but challenging daily. The little guy is testing me lately…my sister says I have the patience of a saint because his non-stop demands for what-the-hell ever are relentless. The four yr old is about to turn in to a five year old and proves she is way too mature for her age daily. It’s literately mind blowing. I’m good I suppose. I’m not writing like I used to but I’m ok with it I suppose. It’s frustrating but I think I just went so full board in that I burned out a little. It’s ok…Momma will get her groove back.

          And vegas…ahhhh vegas!

          • ContactRida 11:47 am on April 6, 2014 Permalink | Reply

            several thoughts: as your girl is wiser than her years, are we born who we will become? nature vs nurture. the more i live, the more i lean towards nature. what if monsters and angels are born, not shaped? what if…

            mojo: being that i need time to absorb your work, i haven’t noticed any change in your writing, but i haven’t been reading your work in the past week or two. no slight on you, i’ve just got time to Like pics and limericks:) maybe you are looking too hard at your work. maybe you are too close. maybe you are wrong…

            womb: there is something about my cervix that everyone wants to put a baby in it. i expect it from family (they have me down as a closet lesbian since all menstruating women in our clan start breeding at 16 and don’t stop until they have great grand kids). but strangers, co-workers, friends, they all want a baby in me. WHAT? it’s hard to envision loving a man so much that i would stop thinking of ‘me’ and start thinking of ‘us’. i am quite selfish and have grown quite fond of the shadow it casts (i’m in a poetic mood:)

            vegas: just say the words Momma!

    • http://theenglishprofessoratlarge.com 10:49 am on April 2, 2014 Permalink | Reply

      I applaud your marrying yourself. I made that same decision years after my divorce when I realized that I didn’t want to re-marry, that I was perfectly content with myself. Don’t stress about the class. If other areas in your life are troublesome, you can always lose yourself for a couple of hours in studying. Think of it as a small vacation from everything else. Take care.

      • ContactRida 3:19 pm on April 2, 2014 Permalink | Reply

        thank you. that’s a new way to look at studying:) it just may work…

    • sinnerz13 10:47 am on April 2, 2014 Permalink | Reply

      Deary me! A train crash of thoughts!

  • ContactRida 12:46 pm on March 22, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , failing class, , , research paper   

    a beautiful mind 


    When I wrote my paper, I believed it to be crap. And no, that wasn’t me being negative. That was me knowing it wasn’t my best work. I felt the paper started with a bang but fizzled in the end since I was pressed for time, needing to get to work.

    But my professor thought it was “beautifully done!”. I got an ‘A’. I currently have 100% in this class. It is a theory/teaching class which involves a lot of writing. So go figure I have an ‘A’ in a writing class. Duh;)  I love to write. BUT, and this is a big but: I have a 75% in my nursing assessment class. WTF?!?

    I can’t seem to get my shit together for this class which involves so much ridiculous memorization and then diagnosing. I spent the past three years NOT diagnosing. I see the question on the test and it asks me to guess what little Jimmy has. How the phuck should I know what little Jimmy has? He either has ebola or he has a cold, I don’t know. Christ! I will fail if I don’t achieve 80%.

    And oh, I just finished an overnight shift where the patient was screaming to call the cops because I wouldn’t give him morphine, oxycontin and valium all at once. That wasted 30 minutes of my time and ALL of my patience. And then there was the CNA who was literally standing next to a patient’s room entering data into the kiosk on the wall while the patient’s call bell was going off. Right beside her! She wouldn’t go into the room until I walked pass her and asked if he was ok. Seriously?

    I really want to quit this job but I’m learning way too much and they are being really flexible with my schedule, and my mistakes. So maybe I will transfer after my vay-kay:) One of the patients said to me this morning. “A lot of people are gonna miss you when you leave.” LOL! “when” not “if”:) He’s one of my favorite patients, a war veteran, loves to curse out people, but the people almost always deserve it.

    So this is my life. I’m teetering on failing a class, with a physical assessment midterm coming up this Monday. So, I can’t seem to get very upset about it since I want to go to medical school anyway. And I really didn’t mean to talk so much about myself, but I haven’t been to therapy in awhile and writing is very therapeutic, sooooooooooo…

    So, short story long, here’s the beautiful paper from a beautiful mind🙂

    Tell Me a Story: The Use of Storytelling in Nursing
    Teaching Strategies
    X University
    School of Nursing

    Learning and teaching are inseparable. Neither can stand alone and neither can operate in a vacuum. Both must be interactive and complement one another. There are several learning theories and many teaching strategies. This paper describes one of many learning theories: cognitive development of socio-cultural historical influences. This paper also identifies one teaching strategy: storytelling. The research findings suggest cognitive development of socio-cultural historical influences and storytelling are interactive as well as complement one another. This paper applies the afore-mentioned learning theory and teaching strategy to andragogy: adult learning. This paper presents multiple literary resources which discuss the various benefits of storytelling in the academic and professional setting and posits the use of storytelling can create better outcomes in nursing education and nursing practice when applied to adult learners.
    Keywords: storytelling in nursing, andragogy, paradigm shift in nursing education

    .Tell Me a Story: The Use of Storytelling in Nursing

    There are several learning theories by which knowledge can be assimilated by nursing students and applied to their nursing practice. One such theory is cognitive development focusing on socio-cultural historical influences. As there are many learning theories, there are various teaching strategies by which to apply each theory. One such strategy is storytelling. The research suggests storytelling aligns with the major tenets of cognitive development of socio-cultural historical influences. This paper explores and examines the afore-mentioned learning theory and teaching strategy as it applies to andragogy: the art of adult learning.

    Literature Review
    Billings and Halstead (2012) describe a learning theory as the foundation that directs the teacher’s mode of instruction to his or her students, “Learning theories focus on how people learn” (p. 206). Billings and Halstead (2012) define the premise of one such learning theory, cognitive development: socio-cultural historical influence: “Learning is interactive and occurs in a social, historical context. Knowledge, ideas, attitudes, and values are developed as a result of relationships with people. Transformative learning occurs through social interactions that are situated in authentic environments” (p. 217).

    This theory involves the sharing of thoughts and ideas between learners. The teacher must have working knowledge of the competing differences and diversities presented by the learners and must also act as facilitator to broach and direct a wide variety of topics. Students have the opportunity to share their experiences from their own unique perspective with other students with differing experiences. This sharing and dialoging creates an environment rich in reflective thought: “Faculty can encourage student identification of the socio-cultural nature of their previous learning through personal reflection, storytelling and comparisons between textbook or clinical examples and their own experience” (Billings and Halstead, 2012, p. 218).

    Storytelling is one of many communication tools used in the socio-cultural historical influences theory. As such, the teaching strategy that complements it is storytelling, defined by Billings and Halstead (2012) as dialogue “that involves a conversation between two or more people” (p. 269). Storytelling as a teaching strategy is consistent with the major tenets of the socio-cultural theory. Haigh and Hardy (2011) state , “stories are reflective, creative and value laden, usually revealing something important about the human condition” (p. 408). Storytelling in education can create a sense of unity amongst students and provide a safe place to voice their fears and concerns (Haigh and Hardy, 2011). In healthcare, storytelling “can be beneficial to patients in creating an environment for the sharing of experience and the creation of supportive groupings… [and has] also been used to explore and erode symbolic boundaries between medics and nurses” (Haigh and Hardy, 2011, p. 410).

    Banks (2012) asserts another benefit of storytelling can be to advance health equity research:
    An African proverb says “until lions have their own ‘story tellers’ tales of a lion hunt will always glorify the hunter.” As long as researchers have sole responsibility for collecting and analyzing data, interventions will reflect researchers’ stories about what is important for advancing health equity… Storytelling may be an especially vital tool for building trust between researchers and populations where historical or on-going oppression, marginalization, power imbalance, and abuse of participants within the research context are part of the collective memory. (pp. 395, 396)

    Christiansen (2011) continues with the benefits of storytelling:
    [T]hrough an emotional and reflective engagement with multiple perspectives storytelling can bring about learning that involves a transformation in how students view themselves others and with implications for practice. Peer dialogue and conversation provide opportunities for students to clarify and share ideas, develop critical thinking and validate new ways of thinking that place the patient experience at the centre of learning. (p. 293)

    What is also now at the center of learning is the student. In the past and still present in some learning settings the teacher was the center of learning and gave direction without addressing the students’ differences or styles of assimilating knowledge. As adults have become students, different learning is needed. Andragogy, as popularized by Malcolm Knowles, is learning specifically for adults (Keesee, 2011). Knowles asserts that adult learners have six characteristics:
    1. Self-concept: adults are self-directed;
    2. Experience: adults learn and draw from their own past experiences;
    3. Readiness to learn: adults are more interested in information that is relevant to them;
    4. Orientation to learning: adults need immediate application to solve problems;
    5. Motivation to learn: adults are motivated by self esteem, curiosity and achievement;
    6. Relevance: adults need to know the relevance of the material being presented. (Keesee, 2012)

    Kantor (2010) also discusses the importance of moving away from the teacher centered, didactic, content laden approach of teaching:
    A linear thinking approach is replaced with an understanding of multiple perspectives and critical thinking skills are further enhanced. The significance of self-reflection and being open to new teaching and learning approaches has implications for nurse educators and consequentially nursing education. (p. 417)

    Cognitive development focusing on socio-cultural historical influences and storytelling can be applied to adult learners on many levels. Adults have varied experiences to share. Sharing their stories will validate their knowledge and also give them the respect they may feel they have earned. Adult learners may find a readiness to share storytelling to impart their knowledge to others as they have more confidence in themselves and their capabilities. Storytelling for adults may bridge gaps between younger adults and older adults and foster more cooperation in academia and the workplace.

    Limitations of These Literary References
    Some teachers may not feel comfortable directing such a broad, diverse population. Having knowledge of all cultures may be a daunting task for some teachers. There is also the skill of engaging students and patients to share their personal experiences in an environment they may not feel safe in. There may also be an issue of getting students to focus on specific, relevant issues. Not all will find this style of learning to be productive and may tune out.

    There are numerous learning theories and teaching strategies from which to draw from. Adult learners must be advocates for their own learning style and discover ways to have their voices heard. Not one shoe will fit everyone, but if there can be a way for each individual adult learner to walk in someone else’s shoes, if only for a moment, nursing education and nursing practice can make great forward strides.

    Banks, J. (2012). Storytelling to access social context and advance health equity research. Preventive Medicine, 55(5), 394?397. doi:10.1016/j.ypmed.2011.10.015

    Billings, D. M., & Halstead, J. A. (2012). Teaching in Nursing: A Guide for Faculty (4th ed.). St. Louis, MO: Elsevier Saunders.

    Christiansen, A. (2011). Storytelling and professional learning: A phenomenographic study of students’ experience of patient digital stories in nurse education. Nurse Education Today, 31, 289-293. doi:10.1016/j.nedt.2010.10.006

    Haigh, C., & Hardy, P. (2011). Tell me a story: A conceptual exploration of storytelling in healthcare education. Nurse Education Today, 31(4), 408-411. doi:10.1016/j.nedt.2010.08.001

    Kantor, S. A. (2010). Pedagogical Change in Nursing Education: One instructor’s Experience. Journal of Nursing Education, 49(7), 414-417. doi:10.3928/01484834-20100331-06

    Keesee , G. S. (2011, March 14). Teaching and Learning Resources / Andragogy: Adult learning theory [Web log post]. Retrieved from http://teachinglearningresources.pbworks.com/w/page/30310516/Andragogy–Adult%20Learning%20Theory

    photo credit: http://31.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4o85vtygH1qzc84bo1_500.jpg

  • ContactRida 6:26 am on March 21, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: adult sex industry, Duke porn star, empowerment, lies, power, sex workers   

    Open Letter to Miriam Weeks 

    Dear Miriam,

    Perhaps it is your youth or perhaps it is your intelligence that has led you astray. Perhaps it is your skewed understanding of the word empower. Whatever the case, please stop spreading your life-altering and horrifically damaging lies about how a woman or young girl can take control of her life and empower herself through the avenues of adult entertainment.

    I applaud you on being accepted into Duke University. I applaud your earnest desire to relieve your parents of the financial burden of paying over $47,000.00 a year for Duke’s tuition. What I do not applaud is your complete and utter ignorance of your other glaringly obvious options other than being a sex worker to finance your education.

    Have you ever heard of community college? Community colleges are excellent schools and provide top notch education. Tuition is also very low for local residents. You can go to school part-time as I did and work at other jobs (albeit menial) to save for transferring to a four year degree university. Many community colleges have agreements with four year institutions and offer scholarships to high performing students. Did you try the scholarship route? You had four years of high school to position yourself as a serious candidate for a scholarship. Why didn’t you do that?

    Have you ever heard of patience? Why must you have an education right now? Tell me. What is urgent about being in college now that won’t be there four years from now? Tell me the urgency. Did you know that many young people join the military and after four years, Uncle Sam thanks them for their service by paying their tuition, most times in full. Did you not have a desire to serve your country?

    Have you ever heard of internships? Guidance counselors are excellent resources for finding internships for seniors in high school. Many internships can lead to well paying jobs and also give you the opportunity to discover what you truly love doing (with your clothes on). Did you seek the assistance of your guidance counselor or anyone on staff at your high school? You are the Y-Generation. Did you do any online research about internships and how beneficial they can be?

    Have you ever heard of sacrifice? Sometimes you need to have a really crappy job or two for a few years before you can get to do what you really want. I worked fast foods. I’ve cleaned homes. I’ve canvassed neighborhoods for political donations. I’ve worked retail. I’ve worked some very difficult and horrible jobs because I had a goal and it was my goal that kept me focused and kept me grounded. Did you have goals? Did you have any plans that involved keeping your clothes on that would lead you to those goals?

    Have you ever heard of Malala Yousufzai? She is the 15 year old Pakistani girl who was shot in the head by the Taliban for daring to voice her beliefs that girls deserve the right to an education. She continues to be that beacon of light to girls around the world who are denied an education based solely on their gender. As a sex worker, how are you a beacon of light like Malala to oppressed girls? http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2013/03/27/malala-pakistan-book-deal/2026697/

    Have you ever heard of Sarah Blakely? Sarah is the founder of Spanx and a self-made billionaire. Listen to her story: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_TZGVQBMg3M
    She didn’t turn to pornography to make her dreams come true. She hit the pavement and did not let rejections or obstacles stop her from achieving her dreams. She persevered. How have you persevered with your clothes on?

    Miriam, if you had said that stripping and being a porn star was a means to an end, I would have given you my support. But you didn’t say that. You said you love having sex for money and it is very empowering. If you want to live that lie, that’s your god given right, but you have no right to spread those vicious lies about the sex industry and recruit troubled and lost girls into your business. Those girls need to know they are more than a walking orifice for semen and random inanimate objects.

    If no one has shared this one particular truth with you, let me tell you now, “What we do today, echos throughout eternity.” You will not get to have a regular life now. You will always be a porn star. Look in the mirror and say those words aloud, “I will always be a porn star.” It will never matter what you accomplish because you will always have the taint of porn on your flesh. This is not slut shaming. This is soul shaming. You sold your soul to the devil for quick, instant returns. Miriam, the devil doesn’t give refunds or make exchanges. All sales are final.

    It saddens me to no end that you have surrounded yourself with people in the adult industry who tell you there are no consequences to being a sex worker. Like attracts like. An alcoholic isn’t going to tell another alcoholic that perhaps they should quit drinking. Human nature doesn’t work that way. Misery loves company. Look into some research on sex workers: http://www.soroptimist.org/whitepapers/WhitePaperDocs/WPProstitution.pdf

    Miriam, if you believe only one thing from this letter, please believe this: being a sex worker is not empowering. Explain to me how you are empowered when a penis is in your vagina, your rectum and your mouth simultaneously? Explain to me the power you feel when several men ejaculate on your face? This is the reality of pornography. Do you have exclusive rights over the films you produce? Do you do the producing, directing, writing, editing? If you can’t answers yes to all of those questions, then Miriam, you have no power. You have no power.


    • Michelle 8:52 pm on April 25, 2014 Permalink | Reply

      I’ve just been reading about Miriam’s story and came across this post, a month late apparently, but I have to say, I find what you are posting here appalling. If you are uncomfortable with porn, fine. If you are uncomfortable with alternative expressions of sexuality, fine. But how dare you tell another woman how she can and cannot express her sexuality, what she should or should not enjoy, what she should find empowering? She will “always have the taint of porn on her flesh” not because her profession or her choices are disrespectable or shameful; she will feel that taint throughout her life because of ignorant, slut-shaming, hateful opinions like yours.

      • ContactRida 9:32 pm on April 25, 2014 Permalink | Reply

        seriously? “how dare I?” you must be completely ignorant of the 1st Amendment. for the same reasons you call my words ignorant and hateful, i give you this platform. it’s called the freedom of speech.

        show your face and don’t be yet another internet troll. do you have a WordPress blog? do you create anything of literary value? well i do. i place myself in the center of any storm i choose. as a survivor of rape, i will not let any woman spread the vicious LIE that taking a dick in her ass is empowering!!! perhaps you find it empowering but i won’t let any troubled girl be lured in by such ignorance.

        everyone’s body is a temple. what you choose to do with your temple is your right. but i will not let someone get away with with the tired yet enticing lie of sex being an empowering force and credible alternative for women.

        so i say with every gram of my being, “Go FUCK Yourself you ignorant cunt!”

    • amy 2:38 pm on March 25, 2014 Permalink | Reply

      Funny how she did this to get money to go to an ivy league school, her degree is going to be far more useless than a community college degree because of her choice. No body is going to hire an ex pornstar, and with a degree as useless as women’s studies, it’s hilarious to me. Her only chance of success now is in the porn industry itself.

      • ContactRida 4:27 am on March 26, 2014 Permalink | Reply

        truer words were never spoken. it is always the intellectual who has the least common sense.

    • Tompengo 1:21 am on March 25, 2014 Permalink | Reply

      One of the Oxford definitions of empower is to make oneself “stronger or more confident.”

      Miriam appears to have gained confidence, partly from her participation in pornography and also by leveraging her academic research and communication skills. I can also understand her perspective, that being in control of her choices (at a broader level and during specific productions) is a key component of her empowerment.

      • ContactRida 3:21 am on March 25, 2014 Permalink | Reply

        you know who else derives power from sex? rapists. yes. rapists. go to this site and get educated on the effects of sexual abuse: http://www.rainn.org/get-information/effects-of-sexual-assault
        no one chooses to be in the sex industry. it chooses them and then they make up stories that they soon internalize and believe. i don’t care about any female who ‘chooses’ to be in the sex industry, as long as she doesn’t spread her lies and entice troubled young girls in. it sickens me to see an already battered girl, get more damaged by an industry and have people like you say it’s ’empowering’ to be gang-fucked on film. your thinking is one-dimensional. you don’t see the deadness and sorrow behind miriam’s eyes. i see it. i see it too often. and i won’t enable her as you have. women need to start standing up and saying NO! i am not a sexual object. this objectification of women has deadly consequences.

    • Tompengo 1:08 am on March 25, 2014 Permalink | Reply

      Unfortunately Community College and Top 1% schools do not offer the same “perceived” educational value.

      • ContactRida 2:54 am on March 25, 2014 Permalink | Reply

        lets agree to disagree. you don’t bother to show your face. perhaps when you believe more strongly in your convictions you will put your face to it.

    • Dawn 6:02 pm on March 23, 2014 Permalink | Reply

      I will never understand the “taking my clothes off for other peoples pleasure is empowering” argument. Ask Madonna how she feels about her sex book now that she is a Mom. Sex is powerful yes. Its her body yes. But by no means does sex empower the body when it is exchanged for cash and other people’s pleasure. It cheapens it and only reinforces the female body to be an object to be used. I would go out on a limb and guess someone taught her that lesson already.

      Well said Rida 🙂

      • ContactRida 12:23 am on March 24, 2014 Permalink | Reply

        thank you. i wish i could make every female see that she is so much more than a sexual object. it breaks my heart and also enrages me to hear, “sex empowers me.” sex and power must never be in the same sentence. but we all must learn our own lessons in our own time.

    • Olbas 4:04 pm on March 21, 2014 Permalink | Reply

      I get the point of this letter but it misses a few points. Whatever we may think Belle may feel it does empower her. Who can speak for her emotions but herself?

      Malala Yusufzai is a hero. She heralds from the FATA region that is littered with terrorists. She was feted by her country folk at large and the world – but this is a different issue. In a way, Miriam Weeks too is fighting for an education.

      She should have gone to a state school for cheap if you ask me my personal view. But she is smart, sassy and beautiful. There is a picture of her pre-porn and she looks like the ideal Geek Princess we all desire. Now that girl is lost to history and that aspect is a tad sad.

      All in all, leave her alone. Its her body, her life. Maybe she just likes wild sex – she should just say that and be done with it. She strikes me as a pretty, smart girl who needed cash. Was her decision ideal – who is to say?

      I’m a PhD student at a state school and whilst I would not turn to porn as as a guy, it’s hard to get a break – if the option realistically existed, I’d probably take it too!

      • ContactRida 9:54 pm on March 21, 2014 Permalink | Reply

        thank you for your response. it is a false empowerment she claims. if she wants her 15 minutes, then no, i will not leave her alone. don’t inject yourself into the public light and cry privacy when you are called out.

  • ContactRida 9:47 pm on March 11, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: midterm, , paper,   

    midterm + paper = going dark 

    Working full-time and going to school part-time is not ideal. I’m off to work now, so I can’t do my weekly run up the stairwell. I need to get some studying in if only 20 minutes. Know I will return by 3/16/14 Sunday.

    In the meantime, here’s a good site for citation help: http://www.citefast.com/

    My paper will be from the articles below. So I will be writing, just not here:(

    Banks, J. (2012). Storytelling to access social context and advance health equity research. Preventive Medicine, 55(5), 394?397. doi:10.1016/j.ypmed.2011.10.015

    Billings, D. M., & Halstead, J. A. (2012). Teaching in Nursing: A Guide for Faculty (4th ed.). St. Louis, MO: Elsevier Saunders.

    Christiansen, A. (2011). Storytelling and professional learning: A phenomenographic study of students’ experience of patient digital stories in nurse education. Nurse Education Today, 31, 289-293. doi:10.1016/j.nedt.2010.10.006

    Haigh, C., & Hardy, P. (2011). Tell me a story: A conceptual exploration of storytelling in healthcare education. Nurse Education Today, 31(4), 408-411. doi:10.1016/j.nedt.2010.08.001

    Kantor, S. A. (2010). Pedagogical Change in Nursing Education: One instructor’s experience. Journal of Nursing Education, 49(7), 414-417. doi:10.3928/01484834-20100331-06

    Stanley, M. J., & Dougherty , J. P. (2010). A paradigm shift in nursing education: a new model. Nursing Education Perspectives, 31(6), 378-80.


    • Karuna 11:10 pm on March 11, 2014 Permalink | Reply

      Reading this post was like a flashback to my past. I worked and raised kids when I went to school for my Masters in Nursing and from 1974-1979 I was Assistant Professor in Nursing at the University of Washington! That time was so long ago it feels like a past life. I hope you enjoy writing your paper and look forward to you coming back to the blog!

      • Karuna 1:28 am on March 12, 2014 Permalink | Reply

        I am replying to amend what I said to you earlier! The memories I mentioned are real but the timing was off. I was already teaching at the University of Washington School of Nursing when my son Sreejit was born.

        I was actually remembering a time in the mid 80’s. At that point, I worked part time, raised kids and went to school. Two years into my pre-doctoral program I changed my mind and decided to start a private psychotherapy practice instead.

        Nursing is a great field. You can go so many different directions with it.

        • ContactRida 10:16 am on March 12, 2014 Permalink | Reply

          understood. nursing is great because you can go many different directions. it’s just the ‘waiting to change direction’ part that is annoying:)

          • Karuna 10:23 am on March 12, 2014 Permalink | Reply

            I most definitely resonate with that sentiment!

      • ContactRida 10:14 am on March 12, 2014 Permalink | Reply

        thank you:)

    • andy1076 10:10 pm on March 11, 2014 Permalink | Reply

      That’s quite a lot of reading etc :O

    • kbeezyisviral 9:49 pm on March 11, 2014 Permalink | Reply

      Study hard and keep your head up.

  • ContactRida 11:58 pm on January 27, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , hands on, kinesthetic, learning styles, tactile, VARK   

    What’s your learning style? 

    Having difficulty learning something? It may not be you but your learning style that’s the issue. Find out what way you learn best at: http://www.vark-learn.com/english/page.asp?p=questionnaire

    I’m kinesthetic: http://studyingstyle.com/tactile-kinesthetic-learners.html

    I am in the rare 5% of learners who need hands on training; reading a book just won’t do. I agree with all of the attributes of my learning style except one: it suggests one of my career paths would be that of a mime. Granted I have a mime book:


    I know what you’re thinking, “Who has a framed picture of themselves?” This was during my acting days and learning mime was another technique to developing the craft. Shut up. I hear you laughing. Anyway, this was one of my assignments due today, 1/28/14, so I thought I’d share it with you to save me time. But as it turns out, I lost time searching for that damn Mime book. OK. I’m off to write my paper… in APA format:(

  • ContactRida 11:56 pm on January 11, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: college, DiCaprio, , financial aid, , Inception, parasite, school, university   

    the most resilient parasite 

    I called the financial aid office on friday before work. School starts monday and I didn’t receive any official letter of aid… well I didn’t open any mail, official or otherwise, for the past 5 weeks. I’m funny like that. So I was bumped around from office to office since departments don’t like to share information. After 10 minutes, I finally got to my aid guy. He said this is the last semester I can receive financial aid. I am totally maxed out. These 6 credits are paid for but nothing else. He said I could only qualify for aid if I went to medical school or pharmacy school; a Doctorate in Nursing would not be financed.

    So that was the idea (the most resilient parasite) that was planted in my head on friday and that idea has not left since. If I need financial aid, it is there for me if I want to become a doctor. A doctor. A work in progress indeed…. Dr. Rida, has a nice ring to it.

    But wait, there’s more. Financial aid guy said there was a two dollar balance left on my account. I won’t be able to attend class on monday if it was not paid. Nice.

    I tried to find quality INCEPTION clips that explained how powerful an idea can be. I really love this movie and have seen it easily 20xs. But I found so much more. The last 2 vids are parodies. The 1st one had me in tears:)


  • ContactRida 6:10 am on January 2, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , Benjamin Franklin, , grants, , Health Care, , Patient, Ralph Waldo Emerson, scholarships, Specialties   

    another scholarship essay headed for the bin 


    Ralph Waldo Emerson stated, “Unless you attempt to do something beyond which you have already mastered, you will never grow.” Truer words were never spoken, yet those words are simple and complex at the same time. Simple, because nursing is not a static profession, and complex because as humans, we can become static due to… life.

    As a nurse with three years of pediatric homecare experience under my belt, I internally always wanted more. After my first year of working, I began applying to hospitals. I was always rejected because my homecare experience did not equate with one year medical/surgical experience. Yes, catch-22, and a debate to be had at another time.

    Yet, I persisted. I accepted a new position in long term care in November 2013. I am now a charge nurse. I went from caring for one pediatric patient for one shift, to managing 30 geriatric and adult mental health patients for, sometimes, two shifts back to back. I am not in my comfort zone, but I am thriving professionally, because I am doing things beyond which I have already mastered.

    This nursing education scholarship will support my professional goals by permitting me to grow as an advanced practice nurse. On my own, I can only acquire nursing skills as the market permits. But with your assistance, I can learn how to expertly treat a broader spectrum of patients, and have a more significant impact on their lives and their communities.

    The nursing profession is not static. The skills and abilities of the nurse should not become stagnant due to economic forces. Growth must be encouraged and also assisted. Continued education is key to that growth. In the words of Benjamin Franklin, “Without continual growth and progress, such words as improvement, achievement, and success have no meaning.”

    **it’s 2014 and school is about to begin, so expect to see more academic posts, especially since i must now work, go to school, watch my shows AND be a dazzling and perfect writer by night (just kidding, i don’t need to write at night;)**

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