Perhaps it is your youth or perhaps it is your intelligence that has led you astray. Perhaps it is your skewed understanding of the word empower. Whatever the case, please stop spreading your life-altering and horrifically damaging lies about how a woman or young girl can take control of her life and empower herself through the avenues of adult entertainment.
I applaud you on being accepted into Duke University. I applaud your earnest desire to relieve your parents of the financial burden of paying over $47,000.00 a year for Duke’s tuition. What I do not applaud is your complete and utter ignorance of your other glaringly obvious options other than being a sex worker to finance your education.
Have you ever heard of community college? Community colleges are excellent schools and provide top notch education. Tuition is also very low for local residents. You can go to school part-time as I did and work at other jobs (albeit menial) to save for transferring to a four year degree university. Many community colleges have agreements with four year institutions and offer scholarships to high performing students. Did you try the scholarship route? You had four years of high school to position yourself as a serious candidate for a scholarship. Why didn’t you do that?
Have you ever heard of patience? Why must you have an education right now? Tell me. What is urgent about being in college now that won’t be there four years from now? Tell me the urgency. Did you know that many young people join the military and after four years, Uncle Sam thanks them for their service by paying their tuition, most times in full. Did you not have a desire to serve your country?
Have you ever heard of internships? Guidance counselors are excellent resources for finding internships for seniors in high school. Many internships can lead to well paying jobs and also give you the opportunity to discover what you truly love doing (with your clothes on). Did you seek the assistance of your guidance counselor or anyone on staff at your high school? You are the Y-Generation. Did you do any online research about internships and how beneficial they can be?
Have you ever heard of sacrifice? Sometimes you need to have a really crappy job or two for a few years before you can get to do what you really want. I worked fast foods. I’ve cleaned homes. I’ve canvassed neighborhoods for political donations. I’ve worked retail. I’ve worked some very difficult and horrible jobs because I had a goal and it was my goal that kept me focused and kept me grounded. Did you have goals? Did you have any plans that involved keeping your clothes on that would lead you to those goals?
Have you ever heard of Malala Yousufzai? She is the 15 year old Pakistani girl who was shot in the head by the Taliban for daring to voice her beliefs that girls deserve the right to an education. She continues to be that beacon of light to girls around the world who are denied an education based solely on their gender. As a sex worker, how are you a beacon of light like Malala to oppressed girls? http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2013/03/27/malala-pakistan-book-deal/2026697/
Have you ever heard of Sarah Blakely? Sarah is the founder of Spanx and a self-made billionaire. Listen to her story: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_TZGVQBMg3M
She didn’t turn to pornography to make her dreams come true. She hit the pavement and did not let rejections or obstacles stop her from achieving her dreams. She persevered. How have you persevered with your clothes on?
Miriam, if you had said that stripping and being a porn star was a means to an end, I would have given you my support. But you didn’t say that. You said you love having sex for money and it is very empowering. If you want to live that lie, that’s your god given right, but you have no right to spread those vicious lies about the sex industry and recruit troubled and lost girls into your business. Those girls need to know they are more than a walking orifice for semen and random inanimate objects.
If no one has shared this one particular truth with you, let me tell you now, “What we do today, echos throughout eternity.” You will not get to have a regular life now. You will always be a porn star. Look in the mirror and say those words aloud, “I will always be a porn star.” It will never matter what you accomplish because you will always have the taint of porn on your flesh. This is not slut shaming. This is soul shaming. You sold your soul to the devil for quick, instant returns. Miriam, the devil doesn’t give refunds or make exchanges. All sales are final.
It saddens me to no end that you have surrounded yourself with people in the adult industry who tell you there are no consequences to being a sex worker. Like attracts like. An alcoholic isn’t going to tell another alcoholic that perhaps they should quit drinking. Human nature doesn’t work that way. Misery loves company. Look into some research on sex workers: http://www.soroptimist.org/whitepapers/WhitePaperDocs/WPProstitution.pdf
Miriam, if you believe only one thing from this letter, please believe this: being a sex worker is not empowering. Explain to me how you are empowered when a penis is in your vagina, your rectum and your mouth simultaneously? Explain to me the power you feel when several men ejaculate on your face? This is the reality of pornography. Do you have exclusive rights over the films you produce? Do you do the producing, directing, writing, editing? If you can’t answers yes to all of those questions, then Miriam, you have no power. You have no power.