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  • ContactRida 5:38 am on May 17, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: buried secrets, , secrets   

    something very dark 

    something dark this way came
    up my spine into my brain
    curious feeling i do attain
    when something dark this way came

    look at my hands they do reveal
    slick and warm it does feel
    circumstances not ideal
    oh this deed i must conceal

    down the stairs and out the door
    not a trace i must restore
    for searching eyes will explore
    the true events of night before

    clouded moon and moistened ground
    give aid to what must not be found
    my throbbing heart the only sound
    perhaps telltale it does confound

    years gone by yet whispers remain
    although my secret forever contained
    but there are times my hands seem stained
    when something dark this way came


    photo credit: http://www.mondo-gore.com/hauntedforest4.jpg

  • ContactRida 2:03 am on May 12, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: incest, , survivor   

    f* you daddy 

    *(i will never apologize for my passion, but i will forewarn that several, SEVERAL f-bombs will be dropped. if you are thin skinned please read no further)


    fuck you daddy
    for your sickness you forced on me
    fuck you daddy
    for the ugliness you revealed
    fuck you daddy
    for the innocence you deprived me
    fuck you daddy
    for the trust i seldom feel

    fuck you daddy
    for filling my heart with rage
    fuck you daddy
    for passing down this shame
    fuck you daddy
    for this daily battle i wage
    fuck you daddy
    for the sorrow that may forever stain

    fuck you daddy
    for the most sacred part you could not damage
    fuck you daddy
    for there is a light in all this darkness
    fuck you daddy
    for i now possess the advantage
    fuck you daddy
    for time has granted such catharsis

    fuck you daddy
    for i found a path through my hatred
    fuck you daddy
    for each day i grow stronger
    fuck you daddy
    for thoughts of you no more wasted
    fuck you daddy
    for you have a hold on me no longer

    so daddy

    photo credit: http://theramp.org/blog/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/victory1.jpg

  • ContactRida 5:17 pm on May 11, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: crash into me, Dave Matthews,   

    crash into me 

    familiar pattern
    i crave what i cannot have
    fantasies of you

    crash deep into me
    breathes delicate desires
    that fade easilydrowning-4

    but come again when
    your words dance upon my heart
    leaving me helpless

    for i see your waves
    they crash hard pull me under
    no sweeter death known


    photo credit: http://media.photobucket.com/user/Hugs4Change/media/Tuskiko2/drowning-4.jpg.html?filters%5Bterm%5D=drowning&filters%5Bprimary%5D=images&sort=1&o=64

  • ContactRida 7:23 am on March 26, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: frozen, Sir Walter Scott, , time wasted, unhonored, unsung, unwept   

    unwept unhonored and unsung 

    she stands upon the cliff frozen
    consumed by thoughts of yesterday and tomorrow
    feeling each second pass as if it were her last
    “can time not stop?” she begged of her god
    “or rather it slow in times of feast
    and fold upon itself during famine?”
    shadows of squandered love haunt her
    whispers of barren future press the same
    “time is unkind as it does not heal
    but replays misery unlearned.”
    but one step would end thoughts
    would end all she had been
    end all she would be
    one step, “and be forgotten
    nothing to mark i was here?”
    better to stay frozen
    than take step and perish with no name
    “unwept unhonored and unsung.”


    title & last line credit: Sir Walter Scott
    photo credit: http://www.visualphotos.com/photo/2×4499576/woman_standing_on_edge_of_cliff_21134.jpg

    • Mike 7:58 am on May 5, 2014 Permalink | Reply

      A splendid piece. The characterisation attracts the reader, as does the monologue and the redemption in the denouement is unexpectedly perfect. I attempted this theme in my Sonnet 017 but yours is the consummate work. Greatly enjoyed, thank you.

      • ContactRida 10:44 am on May 5, 2014 Permalink | Reply

        wow. thank you! i re-read this and was dumbfounded it came from me. i have these moments where i believe i channel from someone not myself.

        i remember my first thought for writing this came from Groundhog Day with Bill Murray and he says, “I thought that was Willard Scott.” so ‘unwept unhonored unsung’ came from a comedy.

        ‘time folding on itself’ comes from my eternal love of scifi. and if you must know, Janeway is the best captain after Kirk of course. and the ending comes from Shakespeare of course, ‘to be or not to be’ , to shuffle off mortal coil gives us pause and makes cowards of us all (i’m paraphrasing:)

        so short story long, so much inspired this one short piece. i wish i could write like this everyday. it seems the pieces i love sooooo much, no one seems to care about, and the stuff i call crap, that takes me literally 15 minutes to write, everyone loves. so there is the cosmic joke which is my life.

        i have my last nursing final today. sorry for writing so much. i will read your sonnet 017 after i get completely sh*tfaced after this last exam. i miss reading others’ works. i get inspiration from them and that secret part of me wishes i had their constant talent. i wish i wish i wish… i will NOT be unwept unhonored or unsung. i will be eternal. i will be.

  • ContactRida 7:02 am on March 20, 2014 Permalink | Reply

    my name is wanted 

    my name is pain
    for all the unwarranted beatings you gave me
    my name is sorrow
    for telling me you wish i wasn’t born
    my name is shame
    for making me feel like i was the sole cause of all of your woes
    my name is damaged
    for what you let happen to me
    my name is worthless
    for never saying how much i meant to you
    my name is exposed
    for never feeling safe with you
    my name is anger
    for seeing what i missed out on
    my name is empty
    for having to start all over again
    my name is motion
    for destroying and laying my new foundation
    my name is persevere
    for always believing in more
    my name is open
    for allowing others to love me
    my name is forgive
    for seeing you did the best you could
    my name is querida
    it means “wanted”
    your name is Mom
    for now i see you always loved me


    photo credit: http://s37.photobucket.com/user/iwanttobeaphotographerwhenigrowup/media/Nudes/lolanbumpweb2.jpg.html


  • ContactRida 6:39 am on February 28, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , matter, meaning, need,   

    tell me again 

    tell me you love me
    tell me i matter
    tell me i belong to you
    tell me all the things i need to hear
    to make me believe i am beautiful in your eyes
    tell me you need me
    tell me i intoxicate you
    tell me everything i need to hear
    to believe i matter
    tell me i am too smart for you
    tell me i will go far
    tell me over and over again
    why i matter
    i need to know that i matter
    i need to believe i have purpose
    so tell me again
    tell me i matter
    photo credit: http://www.chromemusic.de/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/free-love.jpg

    • EYHCS 8:57 pm on March 2, 2014 Permalink | Reply

      Hi ‘Neo’, I love the poem. Thanks for your recent likes on my blog. Take care and good luck on the ebook. Godspeed!

  • ContactRida 12:15 am on February 10, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: apathy, , introspection, lie, projection, , windows to the soul   

    what i allow you to see… 

    …is a projection
    of smoke
    of mirrors
    inside another story unravels
    and folds on itself
    and again
    each time revealing the same


    a tapestry of nothingness

  • ContactRida 11:29 am on February 8, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: connection, , empty, lone,   


    motions of reaching out
    polite smiles and thank yous
    laugh at the right times
    say all of the right things
    not ambivalent
    that would require
    conflicting emotions
    no emotion
    the weight of empty
    is crushing
    crushing a soul
    longing to connect


    Photo credit: Krzysztof Wiktor

  • ContactRida 9:57 pm on February 1, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: bliss, desire, , nomad, wanderer   


    is there a more perfect self-torture than starting over again and again?
    never staying in any one place long enough to make friends.
    always one eye on the future looking for an escape,
    hoping the next door opened will be that final place
    where one can put down roots and be like every one else.
    be normal, ordinary and never alone or by oneself,
    surrounded by friends and family always there to keep you safe.
    no need to want more from life, no need for dreams to chase.
    to be blissful and so well kept no wonder all want to stay
    for who could resist that sweet lie when draped in such a way.
    so the wanderer goes in search of more leaving all ties behind
    never knowing if the next place traveled will hold the ties that bind.


  • ContactRida 6:14 am on January 31, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: beauty, , dead inside, , evil, horror, , pleasure, torture   

    very much dead inside 

    i have those thoughts
    thoughts the average soul does not have
    thoughts dark and simple
    thoughts skewed by my past

    a past forever entwined with present
    but a future disconnected
    no thoughts venture there
    far too many walls erected

    thoughts linger on my conception
    wishing it had never been
    preferring blade to fetus
    than living with what is within

    progeny of a demon
    is the skin that covers me
    leaving half a soul void of light
    absent regret and conscience free

    such dark thoughts i secret
    they come and go with the breeze
    leave me feeling satiated
    i never resist they flow with ease

    what determines the border
    between that of horror and beauty
    what if the two are identical
    fulfilling desire so equally

    i share these thoughts with no one
    for who could understand
    that there is no turmoil
    when i travel to that forbidden land

    there is peace and rapture
    in that place of malevolence
    no fear no pain
    only the truth hangs in the balance

    truth that these dark thoughts
    which i harbor deep inside
    the truth that this darkness
    leaves me very much dead inside


  • ContactRida 11:57 pm on January 19, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: acceptance, , mirror, unconditional love   

    i love you 

    i love the way you look at me sometimes as if i have no flaws
    i love the times you give in to me, times when you should pause
    i love your relentless drive and your constant perseverance
    i love how you throw caution to the wind and take so many chances

    i love that you doubt yourself yet keep seeking your true north
    i love your eternal optimism, how i wish i knew its source
    i love your curiosity and your quest to keep growing
    i love how you follow the wind no matter what direction it’s blowing

    i love your tender heart and your strength, you keep me safe
    i love how you anchor me when i feel out of place
    i love that i can count on you when all others have failed
    i love how you need no map, you blaze your own trails

    when i need you the most, i know you are not far
    i look into the mirror and say, “there you are.”


    what do you love about yourself?

  • ContactRida 6:28 am on January 17, 2014 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: justify my love, lips, love button, madonna, magic carpet ride, , tease,   

    a VAGINA is a terrible thing to waste 

    a Vagina is a terrible thing to waste
    for it is a fantastical place
    so exquisite to ride
    once you glide inside
    but please do not come in hAste

    to Gain entrance press the magic doorbell
    you must search, it is hidden quite well
    keep searching, it’s near
    you’ve got it, rIght there
    oh the anticipation is heaven aNd hell

    take your time inside for sweet rapture awaits
    recall it’s the tortoise who wins the race
    what A delicious sin
    please do it again
    for a vagina is a terrible thing to waste

  • ContactRida 6:52 am on December 26, 2013 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , Christmas and holiday season, holiday, New Year, , reflection   

    the day after… 


    T – time to exhale
    H – home returns to normal, somewhat
    E – enjoy the gifts

    D – do the dishes
    A – accept you spent too much
    Y – yell at the kids

    A – aching back returns
    F – finish off the last bottle of wine
    T – treat self to long, hot bath
    E – entertain the idea of partying for new year’s eve
    R – recognize christmas was enough excitement for the year

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